Ficlet Collection
by kirin-saga
Summary: Collection of G1 and sometimes IDW ficlets and drabbles. Various characters and ratings.
1. Admit It

**Title: Admit It  
Author: Cheysuli Night  
Rated: G  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters.  
Warnings: None  
Prompt: Mixmaster / Skywarp / toy  
Summary: _Mixmaster would never admit it...  
_**

* * *

Mixmaster would never admit it, but he rather enjoyed having Skywarp around. The Seeker was loud and annoying, certainly, but give him something to play with, something to keep his hands busy and away from whatever it was Mixmaster was working on, and he stayed mostly out of the way. Occasionally, he would even offer a decent suggestion about whatever it was that had Mixmaster's attention. Skywarp was rather intelligent if given half the chance and Mixmaster didn't understand how no one could see that. Some of Mixmaster's best creations came about from Skywarp's suggestions.

So yes, Mixmaster liked having Skywarp around. Especially since all Skywarp expected as payment for his input were a few interesting odds and ends that Hook had lying around. Mixmaster didn't mind stealing them for Skywarp; it kept the Seeker coming back and kept him entertained so he didn't touch things he shouldn't.

Besides, Hook blamed Skywarp for the thefts anyways. So it all worked out.**  
**


	2. Sick

**Title: Sick  
Author: Cheysuli Night  
Rated: G  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters.  
Warnings: Implied Slash  
Prompt: Thundercracker / Red Alert / bitter  
Summary: _It was sickening...  
_**

* * *

It was always Starscream and Red Alert. Red Alert and Starscream. Thundercracker was _sick _of it. Who was the Autobot to come and take away the most important person in his and Skywarp's lives? They had been with Starscream for millions of years and Starscream _never _looked at them the way he looked at Red Alert. He hadn't even known the Autobot all that long; an Earth year at most. But still, Starscream and Red Alert. Always. Never mind the war, never mind the dirty looks given to them by both sides, never mind the hurt visible in Skywarp's optics whenever Starscream pushed him away... It was always Red Alert and Starscream.

It was truly sickening.


	3. Computer Lessons

**Title: Computer Lessons  
Author: Cheysuli Night  
Rated: G  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters.  
Prompt: Perceptor / Grimlock / hacker  
Summary: They're not as stupid as you think.  
**

* * *

"Now this is your word processor. With it you can-"

Grimlock ignored Wheeljack's attempt to teach him how to use the computer the inventor had just installed in the Dinobots' quarters. It wasn't as if he was uninterested, but it was mildly insulting how Wheeljack just assumed they didn't know how to do such as simple thing as using a computer.

"And this is the calculator; it'll help you with your counting."

They were machines, computers themselves, right? They would have to be pretty pathetic indeed if they didn't know at least _something _about computers. Granted, they didn't know as much as most 'Bots but they weren't _stupid_. Why couldn't Wheeljack see that?

"This is your web browser. I set up a preprogrammed tour so you can-"

Growing increasingly annoyed, Grimlock shoved Wheeljack away from the computer and sat down in the chair that had dwarfed the smaller 'Bot. Ignoring Wheeljack's sputtering, he glared at the pictures of bunnies on the screen, quickly punched several keys, and escaped the Net Nanny program Wheeljack had set up.

Wheeljack gaped at the screen that was now showing a rather gory dinosaur movie. "How did you..."

Grimlock smirked. "Dinobots not stupid like you Wheeljack think. Perceptor know we smart. Him Perceptor show us computer tricks. Him Perceptor much better teacher than you Wheeljack."

Wheeljack could only watch dumbly as, with a few more taps of the keyboard, Grimlock proceeded to show him exactly what tricks Perceptor had taught him.


	4. Juvenile

**Title: Juvenile  
Author: Cheysuli Night  
Rated: G  
Prompt: Thundercracker / Red Alert / children  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters.  
Summary: They couldn't believe what they were seeing...  
**

* * *

It was embarrassing, really, how immature their respective teammates could act.

"Hey, that's mine!"

"I saw it first!"

Especially when it came to unusual Earth items. They'd squabble over it like newly onlined sparklings. Never mind that they should be shooting each other instead of playing tug-of-war with a... with a...

"What is that thing anyways?"

Thundercracker looked over at Red Alert, who was also watching the 'sparklings' in disbelief. "I was wondering that myself, actually," he said, returning his attention to the 'epic battle'. "I'm wondering if _they _even know."

The Autobot cocked his head, frowning in confusion. "Well, I know _Inferno _doesn't know. We've seen those things before but neither of us was ever interested enough to identify them."

Thundercracker smirked as the firetruck briefly got sole possession of the thing. "Until now, at least."

Red sighed. "Actually, I think he just doesn't want Starscream to have it." He paused a moment, as something just occurred to him. "Speaking of, _why _does Starscream want it? It's of no possible use to him."

Thundercracker shrugged. "Probably for the same reason your friend wants it."

They continued to watch the fight in silence for a few moments while the combatants grew increasingly juvenile.

"Mine!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Not!"

Too!"

"Not!"

Too!"

"Too!"

"Not!"

"_Ha!_"

"Hey!"

"I can't believe you fell for that!"

"I'm gonna _kill _you!"

"_Augh!_"

Thundercracker and Red Alert shared a deadpan look, neither of them able to believe what they were seeing. After a moment, Red sighed and shook his head. "There's an outdoor movie festival about ten miles north of here. It's where Inferno and I were headed. Want to come?"

Thundercracker thought for a moment, glancing over at Starscream to see that he was _still _arguing, and finally nodded. "Might as well. This is getting old. Think they'll notice if we leave?"

Red shook his head. "I highly doubt it. Come on," he answered, transforming and driving off. Thundercracker transformed and followed overhead, slowing his speed in order to keep the Autobot in sight.

Inferno and Starscream never noticed their departure.

* * *

Six hours and three movies later - two of which were highly entertaining... the other Thundercracker and Red Alert agreed to never ever mention as it had scared them so badly they had clung to each other like overgrown sparklings - they slowly made their way out of the large field were the festival had been held, in no hurry to return to their respective bases as they had no desire to explain why exactly they had gone on what could be classified as a date.

"So... I had fun."

Thundercracker glanced over at the Autobot. "I... had fun too," he replied. He glanced at the sky, vainly attempting to think of something to say. What exactly did you say at the end of a date with someone who was supposed to be an enemy? Thank you, lets do it again some time?

Red Alert didn't seem to know either and was currently twisting his hands in nervousness, uncomfortable now that there was nothing to distract him from the fact Thundercracker was a Decepticon. "So... uh..." he trailed off, absentmindedly picking at some blue paint that had been left on his arm during... that movie they were never going to mention. Ever. "Now what?"

Thundercracker shrugged, also starting to pick at the paint on his arm. He had no idea how he was going to explain the red and white scratches. "I dunno." He might have said more, but his comm chose that moment to start chirping and he hurriedly answered it with a profound feeling of relief, uncaring if Red Alert overheard. "Yes?"

"... Hey, TC?"

The blue Seeker brightened. "Skywarp! Finally finished those reports Starscream had you working on?"

"Uh... yeah."

Thundercracker frowned at the uncertainty he heard in the other Seeker's voice. "What's wrong?"

Red Alert perked up, turning his full attention to the conversation, no longer even attempting to appear as if he wasn't eavesdropping. Thundercracker ignored him.

"I just found Starscream and I was wondering..."

Skywarp now had both Thundercracker's and Red Alert's full attention, wondering if this had anything to do with the scene they had left earlier. They couldn't possibly _still _be fighting, could they? They exchanged incredulous glances, hoping that their friends couldn't possibly be _that _childish.

"TC? You there?"

Thundercracker turned his attention to his comm, absently waving Red Alert closer so he could hear better. "Yeah, We- I mean, _I'm _here," he corrected, lowering his comm to Red Alert's level and hoping Skywarp had missed the slip.

Fortunately, Skywarp seemed too distracted to notice. "I was wondering why, exactly, Starscream and that Autobot firetruck were fighting over a Tickle Me Elmo."

Red Alert laughed suddenly, forgetting he was supposed to be quiet. "So _that's _what they're called!"

Thundercracker would have gotten after Red Alert for speaking if he hadn't been too busy trying to calm Skywarp over the fact an _Autobot _had spoken over his comm. He'd get him back for it though, eventually.

Maybe during their next date.


	5. Various

**Title: Various Ficlets  
Author: kirinsaga  
Rated: G - PG  
Pairing: Various  
Summary:  
A/N: Written as a birthday fic for yamisamuraiflo. Sorry it's late. Hope you like it! **And after writing the Springer/Perceptor one I realized it doesn't follow the bunny you gave me very closely. No confused Dinobots, sorry!  
**A/N: Ficlets are completely unrelated.  
**

* * *

_**Name Calling - **_**Springer/Perceptor**

"Why are they calling me Mom?"

Perceptor's optics flickered and he looked at Springer in confusion. "They've been calling you Mom for weeks now, and you're only now asking?" He wanted to laugh at the sulky look on Springer's face, but considering how stressed Springer had been lately, he figured to do so would be cruel. Instead, he turned his full attention to Springer, setting aside the device Wheeljack had asked him to look over.

Springer pouted and waved his arms in frustration. "It didn't _matter _before! But the other Wreckers are coming and _do you know what they'd do if they heard someone call me **Mom**_?!" This last had been shouted, Springer practically in tears and he imagined all the jokes he'd be the victim of once his team arrived on Earth. "I'll never live it down!"

Perceptor sighed. Springer was acting like a sparkling, in Perceptor's opinion. "Springer, you know very well that the Dinobots will not stop calling you their mother." He shook his head, continuing, "The only change they would agree to would be calling you Mama and _you _can't be Mama, because _I'm _Mama." Perceptor was very firm on that point; no one could be Mama but him.

Springer pouted. "But _why _do they call us that?!" He knew the answer, he really did, but he was honestly too upset and nervous to remember. The Wreckers would be here in _three days_.

Perceptor sighed again and turned back to the unfinished device, making small adjustments and correcting some of Wheeljack's calculations. "They started calling me Mama because Wheeljack and Ratchet are Papa and Daddy and they said I didn't act like a Father." He made a small adjustment, jerking back suddenly as the device sparked a bit. "They started calling you Mom when they learned you and I were bondmates," he continued as if nothing had happened and he made some further adjustments. "If you dislike the name so much then you should have spoken up sooner, before they got used to calling you that." He smirked suddenly, looking over his shoulder at the still pouting Wrecker. "And you _certainly _should not have responded to it. I'm afraid you brought this on yourself."

Springer couldn't argue with that; he had practically encouraged the name, finding amusement in the Dinobot's behavior around him and Perceptor. He had seen no harm in it. Now though, with the Wreckers merely _days _away... There was no way they would ever let him live this down. He was doomed.

Springer sulked.

* * *

_**Support **_**- Optimus/Red Alert**

"Come on, it's not much farther."

Red Alert sighed and wearily pushed off from the cliff wall he had been leaning against. He moved slowly, painfully, one hand kept always on the wall in an attempt to keep himself upright.

Optimus watched Red Alert's slow progress, itching to reach out and offer him some support. However, given Red Alert's usual reaction to physical contact... He didn't need any more stress, not in his condition.

Optimus winced as he once again looked over the Lamborghini's injuries, gained in the battle that took place several hours ago and that had caused them to be separated from the other Autobots. Optimus was no medic, but even he could see that if they didn't get back to the Ark soon, Red Alert would be in serious trouble.

Red Alert suddenly stumbled and fell to his knees, crying out in pain as his injuries sparked, the sand being stained with fresh energon. Optimus couldn't hold back any longer and was immediately at Red Alert's side. After a quick visual examination to make sure what he was about to do wouldn't cause more harm, Optimus gently reached out and lifted the smaller Autobot into his arms.

Red Alert made a mumbled protest, saying something about Optimus' own injuries, but the Prime ignored him. Instead, he carefully shifted Red Alert into a more comfortable position before standing and turning once again in the direction of the Ark. "Rest a while, Red Alert. We're almost there."

Red Alert glared tiredly up at him but didn't have the energy to protest. And being carried was far less painful than trying to walk the distance on his own. Still, he didn't like it...

A few minutes later, Red Alert was peacefully in recharge and Optimus smiled in relief as he stepped within range of the Ark's sensors.

* * *

_**Just a Little Crush **_**- Sunstreaker/Perceptor**

He was watching him. Again. For the fourth time in the last two hours. Perceptor was tempted to take a page out of Ratchet's book and launch a heavy object (or two, or three) at the annoying Lamborghini. For the past week Sunstreaker had been stalking him, staring at him, leaving him gifts and offering to help around the lab. The help was greatly appreciated as there were several large pieces of equipment that Perceptor himself could not lift but the other things... It was quite frankly getting creepy. Especially since Sunstreaker never actually _said _anything about why he was acting so strange.

Wheeljack thought it was cute. Ratchet thought it was slagging hilarious. Perceptor, however, thought the whole thing was ridiculous.

After all, all he had done was develop a new kind of wax.

* * *

_**Tantrum **_**- Constructicons/Perceptor**

Scrapper groaned when he heard raised voices coming from the room just off of the Constructicons' main quarters. It was a small room, usually left unused, but recently it had been given to the Decepticons' current 'guest'. There had only been mild grumbling when Megatron had ordered them to guard the Autobot Microscope, more for appearances sake than for any true objection to the order. That peace, however, had only lasted the first day.

That was when the shouting started, the demands, the pleas and the occasional thrown object. Scrapper had tried hard at first to ignore the noise and had succeeded until a particularly loud crash had finally pushed him past his breaking point. And for the first time in _days _Scrapper got to enjoy his beloved peace and quiet...

... For almost a whole day, which was when the other Constructicons decided that they didn't like Perceptor's silence. It made them nervous, they claimed. They liked hearing what the crazy scientist was doing; it made it difficult to be caught off guard. So they made it a point to do their best to get Perceptor to react to them instead of just silently sulking in the corner as he had been doing since Scrapper had blown up at him.

Scrapper twitched as Perceptor finally gave in and shouted back, increasing the noise level well past what Scrapper could tolerate. If the Autobots didn't rescue Perceptor _right now_...

Well, Scrapper could always claim he hadn't known the gun was loaded.


	6. Reflect

On LJ, I was taking requests. People gave me a character and a first sentence and I wrote a fic for them. The challenge is closed now, but I plan to do it again in a week or so.

**Title: Reflect  
Rated: G  
Character: Sideswipe  
A/N: requested by ksiezniczka11  


* * *

**

It didn't take one of the scientists to realize that it was _never_ a good thing when Sideswipe was bored. In fact, the scientists were usually the last to know considering they rarely left their labs and when they did, they were usually oblivious to their surroundings unless something shiny caught their attention. Which was how Skyfire came to find Sideswipe hanging from the hall ceiling. Skyfire stared. Sideswipe glared back. Calmly, the scientist said, "You're reflecting."

Sideswipe glared harder before going back to his attempts to release himself from the net holding him in place. Skyfire watched curiously for a moment, before reaching up to poke at the net. "Did you get caught in your own prank or something?"

Sideswipe stared as if the scientist had grown an extra head. "Nooooo," he replied, slowly as if speaking to a sparkling. "I got caught in someone _else's_ prank. Did you not notice the prank war going on around you?"

Skyfire frowned. "Someone else pranks?"

If Sideswipe had been able to at that moment, he would have slapped the larger mech for his stupidity. "Of _course_ someone else pranks! Thanks to the prank war I started _three_ days ago _everyone_ pranks. _Including_ Prowl and Prime and, apparently, excluding you and the other scientists who wouldn't notice a thirty foot tall blue thing if it had eight arms and clucked like a chicken unless it was shiny and dancing a jig!"

Skyfire stared in complete bewilderment, watching as Sideswipe continued to try to free himself. "You're not blue," he said, reaching out to poke at the struggling mech for a moment, staring in curiosity. "I didn't know there was mirrored paint."

Sideswipe stopped struggling and stared at Skyfire in disbelief. He continued staring for a long moment before finally replying. "They got it from _your_ lab!"

Skyfire frowned. "They did?" He thought a moment, trying to remember anything he had done with paint, before finally vaguely kind of remembering something reflective he had once put in his accidental results closest. "Huh." With that, he turned and walked in the general direction of his lab because now that he thought of it, he remembered that he had never finished what he had been trying to do when he had accidentally made mirrored paint.

Sideswipe continued to hang there, completely forgotten by Skyfire because, as he was busy staring after him in disbelief and no longer struggling, he was therefore no longer quite so violently reflecting.


	7. Shield

**Title: Shield  
Rated: PG-13  
Character: Starscream  
A/N: requested by lady_katana4544  


* * *

**

He constantly went up against Megatron to distract him from his trinemates and the other Decepticon fliers. Not that anyone really noticed except for Skywarp, who noticed the oddest things, and Dirge, for some reason Starscream wasn't able to guess. Not that he really _cared_ what went through the conehead's mind.

In any case, Dirge and Skywarp often found reasons to be nearby whenever Starscream had to distract Megatron. Dirge, apparently, to mock and tease (though anyone who knew to look would see the concern in his actions) and Skywarp to puppy optic him into going to see Hook who, despite his numerous complaints, never seemed to _really_ mind fixing any of them. In fact, if Starscream had refused, the Constructicon would have sulked and complained and claimed he wouldn't fix the bumbling repair job Starscream attempted on himself. Starscream could never figure out if he actually cared or if he just wanted to show off his superior skill. Knowing how Hook's mind worked, it could be both, neither, or something completely different. Starscream didn't really care though, as long as he got fixed.

And he hoped he got fixed soon because it was only a matter of time before Megatron once again needed distracting.


	8. Glitter Black

**Title: Glitter Black  
Rated: G  
Character: Sideswipe  
A/N: requested by cmdrtekk  


* * *

**

"Well, the way I see it the worse thing that could happen is we'll get into a fight and they'll know a team of Autobots is hiding in the outskirts preparing for some kind of armed action, and we'll end up swimming in the smelting pool in Kaon."

This statement earned Sideswipe glares from the surrounding Autobots and not a few threatening gestures. Prowl, for one, was twitching in an attempt to refrain from reaching out and _strangling_ the red twin. Which, as Sideswipe had said, would be the worst possible thing he could do.

Sunstreaker, surprisingly, was the voice of reason. For once. This in itself almost caused Prowl to crash right then and there. Sunstreaker merely ignored him and continued trying to convince his brother that spraying everyone with glittery black paint was not the best of ideas at this moment in time. No matter how much Sideswipe believed it would help them sneak passed the guards.


	9. Wander

**Title: Wander  
Rated: PG  
Character: Jazz  
A/N: requested by hecate_19**

**____________________**

He knew, from the moment he first laid optics on Prowl, that there was no other mech he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He didn't want to know this as he was currently in a happy relationship with another; but his gaze couldn't help wandering to the doorwinged mech.

He could imagine how his life with Prowl would be. Full of arguments as their views and hobbies clashed. Cold silences as each refused to admit they were in the wrong. But he also saw quiet nights cuddled together, sharing amusing stories or watching movies until the early morning. Jazz never wanted anything as much as he wanted that. But Prowl wasn't his. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

But as Jazz sat on the couch late at night, listening to music while his lover recharged against him, he couldn't help but think of all the ways he could claim Prowl for his own. Because Prowl _would_ be his.

And he could only hope Blaster wasn't too hurt in the process.


	10. Comedy

**Title: Baffle and Dazzle  
Rated: G  
Character: Jazz  
A/N: requested by tiamat1972  
**

"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle the slag out of them." When he said this, Jazz usually received the response: "And you obviously can't dazzle them with brilliance." Jazz didn't mind this; he knew not everyone could be a genius and he _did_ tend to annoy the scientists. It wasn't his fault he had nothing to do but bother them. Not that bothering them was _easy_ (considering how difficult it was to get their attention) or even entirely fun (considering what they could do in revenge) but it was still _something_ to do. And he was. So. _Bored_.

Or he had been bored. Before he had 'baffled' one scientist too many. Or maybe he could say he was more bored than before, now that the pain was gone and his body was blissfully numb. And he was in a box. With no holes to peak out of. And he appeared to be in some kind of storage room.

Maybe he shouldn't have baffled a scientist who was friends with Ratchet. Maybe then he wouldn't currently be a toaster.

Maybe Prowl would now know better than to send him to boring places.

... And maybe one day he would actually live this down.

____________________________________________

**Title: Fallen Friend  
Rated: G  
Character: Ironhide  
A/N: requested by mmouse15  
**

Weighed down with despair, the weapons specialist hung his head. All around him Autobots tiredly pulled themselves to their feet and looked around in a daze, shocked to see that they had actually survived that seemingly never ending battle. But they had, and the Decepticons were sent scrambling back to their base to lick their wounds.

Ironhide supposed he should be happy to be alive, happy that his friends and comrades had survived. But all he could think as he stared at the mangled remains of a long time friend was that he would never find a gun as good as his beloved Betsy ever again.

_______________________________

**Title: Glitter Glue  
Rated: G  
Character: First Aid  
A/N: requested by lady_katana4544. Not a sequel to Glitter Black  
**

The young medic was valiantly trying to keep a giggle from escaping as he watched his brothers and the Aerialbots. He was failing miserably, but he was trying. He couldn't help it really, considering the streamers and the glitter and how they all seemed to be somehow glued together. And they were all glaring at him. Lovely.

First Aid couldn't blame them though. Out of all of them, he was the only one who had escaped the prank. He didn't know if it was luck or if whoever had come up with this remembered how Ratchet reacted the last time one of his students got caught in a prank. Either way, he was perfectly clean and they were not and he was so going to die whenever they managed to free themselves.

__________________________________

**Title: Logic Crash  
Rated: G  
Character: Prowl  
A/N: requested by tiamat1972  
**

He rubbed his chevron, trying to relieve the ache of a logic center ready to crash. He should be used to this by now, considering all he had witnessed since joining the Autobots. But these events never failed to surprise him. And likely never would. Ever. The thought made Prowl want to do nothing more than sit down and cry.

"Join in, Prowl! It's fun!"

Prowl whimpered and cowered in the corner, trying very hard to ignore everything around him. And trying very hard not to watch Optimus Prime doing the chicken dance.

_________________________

**Title: Pests  
Rated: G  
Character: Steeljaw  
A/N: requested by eerian_sadow**

If he got out of this alive, he was going to kill his brothers. Not just kill. Massacre and dance a jig around the shredded remains.

"How many times do I have to tell you to hold _still_?" his current tormentor growled, smacking the lion upside the head. "I would have been done _long_ before now if you didn't keep moving."

Steeljaw hissed as Ratchet leaned closer to him, dreaded tweezers of doom clutched tightly in one hand, and plucked another tiny mechanical parasite off his body.

Yes, Steeljaw was going to maim, shred, and _annihilate_ his brothers for convincing Wheeljack to make robotic fleas.

____________________________

**Title: Wackyland  
Rated: G  
Character: Starscream  
A/N: requested by cindy_73  
**

He couldn't quite grasp what he saw, but all Starscream knew was that logic didn't exist here and chaos was god. He didn't think he was on Earth anymore, and wondered if Skywarp had anything to do with him being here. Maybe his trinemate had tried teleporting while high on Mixmaster's high grade again and had somehow brought Starscream along for the ride. Despite Starscream not remembering the ride. Or maybe he himself was high on Mixmaster's brew. Yeah, that had to be it. He was high and out of his mind. That would explain why the colors kept disappearing. It would explain why there was a pig chasing some kind of crazy, illogical bird thing all around and over and oh Primus, _through_ him.

Starscream watched all this, hovering on the edge of an emotional and mental breakdown, literally watching as a balloon labeled _Starscream's Sanity_ carried the bird thing out of the pig's reach, and started to giggle hysterically.  
_____________________________

**Title: Do the...  
Rated: G  
Character: Soundwave  
A/N: requested by mmouse15**

He observed his master with no expression but the thought flitted across his processor that Megatron had finally lost all his reason. He had had his suspicions that this would happen one day; no one in Megatron's position could maintain their sanity forever. Especially considering who the Decepticon warlord had to deal with on a daily basis.

Soundwave sighed and settled back against the far wall, out of the way, and desperately wished he was anywhere but here. But he had been ordered to remain where he was and provide the needed music.

But Soundwave swore, as passionately as he was capable of, that he was going to _murder_ whoever had convince Megatron to start a conga line.

__________________________

**Title: You Sexy Thing  
Rated: PG  
Character: Megatron  
A/N: requested by arkred (who gave me that entire first paragraph)**

If someone would have told him a vorn ago that his life and the cause that all of them have been fighting for all this millennia would depend on his SIC's pretty aft, he'd have shot them in the face... Now? He just wanted to deactivate before the seeker started to preen.

It was just their luck really, to have landed on a world where the natives were so fascinated by aircraft. Starscream had transformed in order to get away from the annoyances and they had _swarmed_ him, climbing him, taking pictures, patting him, and... _cooing_ at him. For a moment, Megatron expected Starscream to take off with them still on him and let them fall to their deaths. Then Starscream started bragging and Megatron gave him up for a lost cause. At least he was distracting the annoyances who moments before had been attacking them with surprising success.

Megatron decided that now was the time for retreat. And looking at Thundercracker (who was smart enough to _not_ transform), he could see he agreed. Skywarp, it seemed, had already escaped, the slagger.

So Megatron and Thundercracker retreated. Quietly.

And Starscream started to preen.

____________________________

**Title: Yum Yum  
Rated: G  
Character: Shrapnel  
A/N: requested by ink_in_hand**

It was, by far, the most _humiliating_ rescue he had ever had the displeasure of experiencing. And he'd had his share of embarrassing rescues, not that he'd admit it anywhere but in the privacy of his own head. But _this_ took the cake. And pie. And cookies and oh Primus he was _hungry_. Maybe he could eat the thing...

But no. If he ate it then he would be right back where he had just spent the last several days, lying in the shadow of a peanut factory he had crashed through. The peanut butter had been enjoyable until he realized it was clogging his joints and making it very difficult to move. If only it had been creamy and not extra crunchy, it wouldn't have been such a large problem.

And if that hadn't been enough suffering, Shrapnel had learned that certain species of birds greatly enjoyed picking the peanuts off of the Insecticon's immobile (but loudly complaining) form.

Which lead to the arrival of Laserbeak who was curious about what the native organics were swarming. Shrapnel would have been annoyed at the cassette's presence if Laserbeak hadn't finally chased off the birds and called Soundwave once he had tired of taking pictures.

Primus, Shrapnel was _so_ hungry. Maybe just a little bite...

**A/N2: I was so tempted to title this one _And Jelly_ but I thought that might give it away.**


	11. Darker

**Title: The Best Thing  
Rated: PG  
Character: Red Alert  
A/N: requested by yami_samuraiflo  
**

He wasn't paranoid; he just saw things in a way others had never considered. Where others saw a simple get together, a small party to unwind after the stress of a busy day, Red Alert saw the highest ranked Autobot officers in one place at one time. The perfect time for Decepticons to severely cripple the Autobot army. And he told them this, often, and quite loudly too. And they brushed his words aside and continued on as if they hadn't a care in the world.

Red Alert didn't tell them how many times he had seen Decepticons skulking about in the darkened halls, how his enhanced sensors sometimes detected something _wrong_ with the energon in the Officers' mess. He just quietly killed the spy and disabled the energon dispenser. Sometimes.

Sometimes though, he let the Decepticon live. Sometimes he ignored the wrongness of the energon. Sometimes he even went so far as to allow small holes to appear in his security network.

He wasn't a traitor, this he knew. He wanted the Autobots to win as much as anyone. But sometimes he could see that the Autobots would fall if High Command continued being crippled by those in charge.

Sometimes, he could see that ignoring the assassin lurking in the halls was the best thing he could do.

_________________________________

**Titles: And Eyes...  
Rated: PG  
Character: Perceptor  
A/N: requested by outerelf. Xover with Silent Hill (which I've never actually seen/read/played).**

Perceptor had been sure that sooner or later he'd get out of Silent Hill (whatever it may be), but it wasn't until he saw the red and white Lamborghini sparkling did he realize that he might not get out. Oh he had finally _left_ the strange town that both did and did not exist, but that did not mean he had ever escaped. One did not ever _escape_ Silent Hill. And when Incubator had handed the sleeping sparkling to him, he knew, even if he managed to leave, that he was now part of Silent Hill forever.

And no matter how many times he tried to forget the true nature of the sparkling he raised, all he had to do was look in Red Alert's optics and see ghostly images of a place that should not exist and he knew, without a doubt, that he was as trapped now as he had been all those vorns ago.

___________________________

**Title: Silent Noise  
Rated: G  
Character: Soundwave  
A/N: requested by yami_samuraiflo (this ended up taking place in the same 'verse as _Who They_)**

Silence, he mused, was something he could get used to. He didn't like it, would never _like_ it, but he would get used to it just as he got used to nearly everything else. Just as he had gotten used to the absence of his oldest set of twins. Just as he had gotten used Rumble's constant questions about why his older brothers had left and how he had gotten used to Frenzy's disapproving glare whenever the subject was brought up.

Soundwave had long gotten used to not being able to hide anything from Frenzy.

Everything was silent in their home nowadays. No sports scores being shouted across the room, no being pestered with random bits of trivia. Even Rumble kept quiet, no longer listening to the bass heavy music that was felt more than heard. And all Frenzy had been doing lately was glaring and sulking and making sure his brothers' things were properly taken care of.

Soundwave was quiet used to silence by now, to the suffocating stillness of life. Yes, he was used to it.

Soundwave switched on the radio, volume on high.

_________________________

**Title: Missed Chance  
Rated: G  
Character: Bluestreak  
A/N: requested by dreamer_way**

Even though he should feel happy, he didn't on the inside. He wanted to scream and cry but instead he was grinning stupidly, rambling on and on about he didn't _know_ what. He didn't think anyone noticed, except for Prowl who noticed everything and maybe Perceptor if he was paying attention. But no one he didn't want to know seemed to notice. That was the important thing. That almost made him happy.

But then he'd catch a glance of the couple at the far end of the room, see them whisper to each other and laugh quietly as they leaned against each other. And Bluestreak's voice would hitch briefly before continuing at an even quicker speed, until he suspected even Blurr would have difficulty understanding him.

He should have stopped looking. He really should have. He should have gotten up and left the moment they entered the room. But then everyone would have known how unhappy he was, and he couldn't have that.

So he stayed and talked and tried not to watch his best friend cuddle up with someone who would never be good enough. Tried not to look and think _He could have been mine._


	12. More Comedy

**Title: Welcome Home  
Rated: G  
Character: Ultra Magnus  
A/N: requested by mimi_sardinia**

The moment he saw Optimus Prime for the first time in half a megavorn, he wanted to wrap his beloved friend in a deep hug. Instead, he walked up to him and smacked him upside the head and glared at him as the surrounding mechs and femmes laughed at the Prime's expression. Optimus and his team, on the other hand, were staring at him as if he had installed another head. Magnus glared harder. "If you _ever_ disappear like that again..." He growled, glaring still, for a moment before turning and marching away.

Optimus scrambled after him, much to the amusement of both teams. "But, it's not my fault!"

Yeah, things were finally back to normal. And since Magnus would be busy with Optimus for a while, maybe their commander wouldn't mind if they had a little fun themselves?

Optimus' crew saw the looks aimed their way and grew very, very nervous.

________________________________

**Title: Noisy, Noisy  
Rated: G  
Character: Swindle  
A/N: requested by usemychopsticks**

With all the arguing going on, he had to wonder why they didn't just take the easy rout and shove him out a window. _He_ wanted to shove him out the window, so Swindle knew it was a good idea and he didn't understand why his brothers couldn't see that.

Interrogating Talking to their captive Autobot had been fun at first. He wouldn't reveal anything and they got to watch as Vortex tried to convince him otherwise. It looked like it would work, at first, but then the Primus-damned Autobot started blasting _noise_ at them.

Swindle recognized human music when he heard it, he _did_ live on the same base as Soundwave after all, but this was the first time he had it blasted into his audios. Swindle was _this_ close to just picking the tape deck up and flinging him out the window - or into a hard surface - protesting brothers be slagged.

But Onslaught _knew_ the Autobot had information they needed and insisted on keeping the annoying thing. If they kept him much longer, Swindle knew, the noise and deep bass would bring the base down around them. Or split his head open, whichever theory would get them to agree to get rid of it.

But as Swindle saw one of his brothers unconsciously starting to sway to the music, he figured they weren't getting rid of Blaster any time soon.


	13. First Aid and Fireflight

**Title: Battle Tested  
Rated: PG  
Character: First Aid  
A/N: requested by lapinporokoira**

Here he was, in the middle of a battle with his first ever patient. First Aid could not imagine a worse situation if he tried. Not that he wanted to try, of course, considering how stressed he already felt as he desperately tried to seal off the numerous leaks in his patient's systems. His _patient_. He'd only had a handful of lessons in repair and here he was with an actual _patient_.

Primus must be laughing. Or Unicron. Or someone.

But First Aid refused to dwell on the possible amusement he provided and continued calmly - he was _calm_, slag it! No matter how much he was panicking - repairing the injured mech before him. His hands jerked as a missile exploded nearby, nearly destroying what he had already repaired. He paused a moment before shakily returning to his work, chanting over and over that he could do this.

He wasn't sure he could do this.

_____________________________________

**Title: Eclipse  
Rated: PG-13  
Character: Fireflight  
A/N: requested by seikk**

It felt like forever since he'd last seen the sun. It was a strange thought to have, considering he was currently standing outside on a brightly lit afternoon, but it was true nonetheless.

He supposed he should be thinking of other things, like the party going full swing behind him, celebrating the end of the war that most had believed would continue on forever. His gestalt mates were there, he knew, for once doing as he asked and leaving him be. They needed the party. They all needed it, all earned it. Even himself, he knew, despite how much he believed he didn't deserve it. There were so many that deserved it far more than he did. So many who couldn't be here. So many who couldn't be anywhere ever again.

Fireflight stared blankly up at the painfully bright sun, remembering the mech who used to take him flying in the predawn light. Who used to bring him pictures of countless sunlit landscapes. Fireflight remembered, and didn't look away.

He missed the sunrise.


	14. Mix

Please ignore lame chapter title.

**Title: Hard Earned  
Rated: G  
Character: Swindle  
A/N: requested by anonymous**

There was something to be said about selling your brothers to the Russian Government, he just didn't know what it was. Oh, people had had a lot of things to say about him selling his brothers to the Russian Government, but he had mostly tuned them out even before they had started repeating themselves. He was more concerned with how to reclaim all the money he had lost getting them back.

It wasn't fair really; he had earned that money fair and square. So to speak. He shouldn't have had to dip into his own hard earned funds when any one of them was perfectly capable of buying their own freedom. Of course, since Swindle had appropriated their accounts when he had sold them and they couldn't exactly _access_ said accounts... Well, that was still no excuse to drive their dear brother into bankruptcy.

Hopefully his brothers would calm down enough to allow him to convince them of this fact.

* * *

**Title: Teacher, Teacher  
Rated: G  
Character: Ratchet  
A/N: requested by lady_katana4544**

He found teaching the young Protectobot how to be a medic was refreshing from the everyday job of being a battlefield medic. Not that teaching was _easy_, it was just preferable to calmly go through each step of a procedure in a controlled setting than to have to make frantic repairs in the middle of a chaotic battlefield.

Though Ratchet would have been happier if his student wasn't part of a Gestalt. A Gestalt that seemed to enjoy making First Aid break out in laughter in the middle of a tedious procedure. But Ratchet, for the most part, tolerated it.

After all, you couldn't have everything.

* * *

**Title: Two Plus Two Equals What?  
Rated: G  
Character: Starscream  
A/N: requested by yami_samuraiflo**

Life was a fragger, and the red seeker had long since learned that the only way to beat her was to be worse than her. Oh he had tried other methods, quite a few of them, in fact. But nothing else quite had the same results as staring Life in the face and making an annoyance of yourself.

Being an annoyance shouldn't be quite so successful in keeping one alive, but he had noticed that the higher ranked you were, the more annoying you seemed to others. Two plus two equals four and all that. Though if you _really_ wanted to be annoying, you'd argue quite fiercely that two plus two equaled eleven. Sure, people looked at you as if you were an idiot but you got noticed, and therefore succeeded in surviving another day.

Regrettably, Starscream thought as he stared down Galvatron's cannon, nothing ever lasted forever.

* * *

**Title: All Mine  
Rated: PG  
Character: Sunstreaker  
A/N: requested by novadiscord**

Sunstreaker absolutely hated it when other mechs tried to flirt with his twin or their lover Prowl and he made sure that the offending mechs knew of his displeasure. Now most would think that he accomplished this by simply beating the slag out of the offending mech. This was not so. Sure, he _did_ often beat them up but this was far from the only thing he did to them.

He'd follow them during his off hours, glaring and making himself noticed. And he'd smile. He'd arrange for them to share a duty shift and he wouldn't do a single threatening thing while the other mech had a quiet breakdown. He'd rig their doors to open at random times during the night while a nearby radio was programmed to play the sounds of footsteps. And when they ran screaming from their quarters in the dead of night and would crash into him where he'd been waiting... then, _then_ he would beat them up.

No one ever flirted with Sideswipe or Prowl more than once.


	15. Should Have Known

**Title: Should Have Known  
Rated: G  
Characters: Primus, Unicron  
A/N: requested by alabaster_demon (actually alabaster_demon just requested Unicron, but I somehow managed to overlook the giant mech and wrote Primus. So I wrote her another one with the sentence she gave me).**

**_______________________**

**Primus**

Although any mech who knows Sideswipe and Sunstreaker can testify to the rough-edged, often-hidden affection between Cybertronian twins, few consider the implications when this is applied to Primus and his black-sheep of a brother. He didn't know why this was. He didn't know why so many of his creations heard the story of them being twins, saw how twins all around them acted, and failed to put two and two together. Sometimes, he feared that he had done something wrong so long ago when he had started this race and that his creations were a bit slow in the head. But then he saw all the wonder they created and felt even more confused.

_Maybe,_ Primus thought one day, having nothing better to do, _'they need a hint or two.'_ That decided, he lazily scanned the minds of his creations, pausing every now and then when a particularly strange thought caught his attention, and planted a thought here, a dream there, and then retreated. Patiently, he waited to see the results of his actions.

When results finally came though, it was a surprise. He had expected one of the artists he had touched to paint something, or a writer to write something. He had never expected to witness a mech and femme staring in confusion at their creation's toys, asking why his Unicron and Primus figures were in that position.

**Unicron**

Although any mech who knows Sideswipe and Sunstreaker can testify to the rough-edged, often-hidden affection between Cybertronian twins, few consider the implications when this is applied to Primus and his black-sheep of a brother. He knew that this fact often troubled his brother. He didn't know why, exactly, Primus got upset over such a little thing when there was so much else he should be worrying over.

But the fact remained that this bothered Primus enough to actually do something about. This alone caused Unicron to take more than a passing interest in the little parasites that covered his brother's body. Because of this, he witnessed the amusing consequences of Primus' attempt to beat knowledge into his creations.

Primus still refused to forgive him for laughing.


	16. A Depressing Lack of Options

**Title: A Depressing Lack of Options  
Rated: G  
Character: Dead End  
A/N: requested by usemychopsticks  
_________________________________**

That was the problem with dealing with these types of mechs, they usually saw you coming. This made it really hard to find a suitable partner for some intelligent conversation, instead forcing him to subject himself to confusing - and sometimes, creepy - conversations with one of the less intelligent - or crazier - mechs.

Dead End stared longingly after Scrapper and Hook who he had been hoping to have a stimulating conversation about the futility of life with. Scrapper often had something profound to say in response and Hook's scathing sense of humor never failed to amuse him.

But they rarely had time for trivial conversation they claimed, especially when Megatron was hounding them for some device or another. Which meant that Dead End's options for conversation, that didn't involve his own Gestalt mates, was severely limited. Usually severely limited to the Constructicons that weren't busy since the Gestalts were usually ignored by everyone else and the Combaticons made him nervous.

Not that the Constructicons didn't make him nervous, he mused as he listened to Mixmaster's rambling account of one of his experiments. Especially since, for all that most of them seemed perfectly normal, the Constructicons were one of the crazier teams in the Decepticons. Something to do with a smasher and a really big guy, he had heard. But Scrapper and Hook were usually good conversationalists when he managed to catch them, so Dead End could ignore their eccentricities.

Mixmaster, on the other hand, scared the slag out of him when he was talking about experiments, especially when he was looking at him like a particularly interesting specimen. And trying to get him to drink something that Dead End was fairly certain was alive.

Luckily, Scavenger came over to drag him away, rambling about some souvenir he had picked up recently. Dead End watched them go, for once feeling happy to be alive.

He could really use a good conversation right about now.


	17. Gifts and Hostility

Title: Gifts  
Author: kirin_saga  
Rated: G  
Summary: Blaster receives a gift. Blaster is not amused.  
A/N: Inspired by a pic that ink_in_hand drew for me.  
A/N2: Space bar sticks *is annoyed* so let me know if anything is spaced funny.  
A/N3: Written while trying not to fall asleep at the library. Typed later while trying to get a kitten to leave my hands alone.

Blaster twitched when he saw the... gift that had been left on his bed. If there was one thing he hated about Earth, it was that it gave everyone too many ideas of what to do in their spare time. Sure, he himself was influenced by the humans' ever changing musical trends, but as he saw it, _that _was a good thing.

_This _however... "That has got to be the biggest rat I have ever seen." And it _was _huge, about the size of a basketball and he briefly wondered if it was a rat at all. Not that he cared, really; he just wanted it gone.

Sighing, he turned to get something to throw it in, and froze when he noticed the five other creatures piled on his desk. "Steeljaw!"

Steeljaw smirked and calmly licked a paw as he watched, safely hidden under the berth, as Blaster continued to freak out over a few dead organics.

Earth was so much fun.

* * *

Title: Hostility  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G  
A/N: I was doing a Fanfiction Writer's Meme on DA. This happened.

Springer worriedly watched the other two mechs, slightly amused at their actions but mostly afraid that one or the other would decide to just leap across the table and tear into one another. He couldn't believe it had taken him this long to notice the hostility between the two (he chose to ignore the fact that it had take the sight of Roadbuster attempting to strangle Hot Rod for him to notice) and wondered what could have caused his two best friends to react in such away.

The other Wreckers, meanwhile, wondered how long it would take Springer to realize he was being fought over.


	18. Fic Meme Part 1

Title: Fic Meme (creative, I know)  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G-PG  
Characters/Pairings: Various  
Universes: G1, IDW  
Summary: Lots of little ficlets.  
A/N: Saw this on alabaster_demon's LJ:

_First you randomly pick 10 characters from a manga/anime/book/game/movie/real life/etc. They can be male or female. Or even not human, I suppose._

1. Blaster

2. Springer

3. Skywarp

4. Rumble

5. Hook

6. Red Alert

7. Perceptor

8. Soundwave

9. Roadbuster

10. Prowl

'You': Optimus

_Then you answer the questions below by plugging in the person next to the respective number into the question!_

Now, before you read the results of my list, here is a link to the unfilled questions in case you want to try this yourself: alabaster-demon[dot]livejournal[dot]com[slash]8934[dot]html

**WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF**

**Number 1 woke you up in the middle of the night 'cause he/she had a bad dream?**

Optimus tiredly, blankly, stared at the mech that stood nervously just outside his door, trying to make sense of his... odd request. "You... what?"

Blaster fidgeted a bit and looked at the taller mech with his best kicked puppy expression. "I had a bad dream and Papa and Dad aren't here, can I sleep with you?"

That's what he thought the youngling had said. He sighed. "Blaster, it was one thing when you were a sparkling, but I don't think it would be appropriate now."

Blaster pouted. "_Please_, Hoppy?"

Optimus froze at the nickname; he could never refuse Blaster anything when he used that name in that tone. Prime groaned. "Fine, Blaster," he said as he stepped to the side to allow Blaster to enter his room. "Just... don't let your creators know. I have a feeling they wouldn't approve."

Blaster grinned and gave Optimus a hug before entering the room.

**Number 2 asked you to go out with him/her?**

Optimus stared in disbelief at Springer before quickly going over what he had just heard a few times and, when what he had heard hadn't changed, rebooted his audials and calmly asked the Wrecker to repeat himself.

Springer grinned, bouncing lightly on his feet and generally acting far too perky for Optimus' peace of mind. "I asked if you wanted to go get a drink or something; you've been couped up in here for _way _too many orns and you need to get out. And get drunk with me."

So he hadn't misheard after all. Optimus continued to stare at the grinning Wrecker, wondering if Springer had already gotten a head start on getting drunk, and quietly thought over the proposal. While he did finally realize he needed a break, he wasn't convinced getting drunk with Springer was the safest option. While Springer himself was rather oblivious about being the focus of others attentions, Optimus fully realized that if he were to take him up on his offer, he would have two very pissed off and jealous mechs gunning for him, one of whom was another Wrecker and knew several hundred different ways to hide a body. Optimus winced. "Maybe some other time."

Springer pouted.

**Number 3 walked into the bathroom while you're showering? (Assuming you forgot to lock the door and not that you're an exhibitionist of some sort.)**

"You missed a spot."

Optimus jumped, dropped his scrub brush, and whirled around to face the owner of the _very _unexpected voice. Skywarp smirked as the sudden movement cause the Prime to fall into a very undignified heap on the floor of the washrack. Optimus stared blankly up at him.

Skywarp took a few image captures of the downed mech before teleporting away, his laughter echoing in the small room.

Optimus twitched.

**Number 4 announced he's/she's going to marry tomorrow?**

Optimus stared at the tiny mech in confusion, wondering why he had thought Optimus needed to be informed of this and why he had come _here_ to tell him. "Uh..." Optimus thought for a moment. "Congratulations?"

Rumble sighed and held up a datapad. "I need a Prime's signature for it to be official and he won't settle for anything less. So... please?" He looked faintly embarrassed by that last word, and refused to look up at Optimus as he waited for the Autobot to reply.

Optimus stared a moment longer, causing Rumble to fidget a bit, before cautiously reaching down and taking the datapad. He read the contents, confirmed that they were in fact what the cassette had said they were, and placed his signature at the bottom. "I... I hope you two have a happy life together," he said as he handed the datapad back.

Rumble said a quiet thank you before disappearing back into the Ark's ventilation ducts.

**Number 5 cooked dinner for you?**

Optimus stared dubiously at the strangely colored energon that had been handed to him through the bars of his cell. After watching it bubble and foam for a moment, he carefully set it aside and looked at the mech who had handed it too him.

Hook scowled and crossed his arms. "We're low on supplies, ok? Just be glad I didn't let Mixmaster make it; it would have eaten through the floor by now."

Optimus shuddered and gave the cube a halfhearted poke as he watched the Constructicon stomp out of the brig.

**Number 6 was sitting beside you on a couch, asleep?**

Optimus sat very, very still as the mech sleeping against him shifted into a more comfortable position. While the fact that Red Alert had fallen asleep against him told him how much the usually paranoid mech trusted him, he really wished he had chosen a better time to show it. Like when Inferno wasn't in the room to glare at him.

Seeing the dirty look aimed at him from the angry fire truck, Optimus attempted to make himself as small as possible and made a note to check his quarters for flammable substances.

**Number 7 suddenly confessed to be part of your family?**

"You're _what_?!"

Perceptor winced and backed away from the flabbergasted Prime. "Your creator, sir." At Optimus' continued staring, he continued. "I'm sorry for not telling you and giving you up but you see I was rather young at the time and still in school so I could barely afford to take care of myself let alone a sparkling but I made sure you had a very good home and I kept track of you and you can't imagine how proud of you I was when you were appointed Prime and I would have told you sooner but I was afraid of how you'd react and I'm bothering you, aren't I? I'm sorry." With that, he turned and ran from the room.

Optimus continued to stare at the spot his head scientist... no, his _creator_, had just vacated for a long, long while.

**Number 8 got into the hospital somehow?**

Optimus stared at the mech lying unconscious on the medical berth, quietly watching as Ratchet finished repairing a cracked fuel pump. As Ratchet carefully removed his hands from Soundwave's body and began replacing that piece of the Decepticon's armour, Optimus finally broke the silence. "How is he?"

Ratchet didn't even glance up as he answered, "Considering the severity of his injuries, he's doing remarkably well," he said as he finished up and finally looked over at Optimus as he began wiping the energon from his hands with a cloth. "That fuel pump was the last thing needing repairs." He tossed the soiled cloth to the side and glared at Optimus. "Now would you mind telling me why you dragged him to my medbay instead of letting the 'Cons deal with him?"

Optimus hesitated, recalling how Blaster had scrambled up to him, rambling incoherently and dragging him away from the others and towards an area closer to the Decepticons' side of the battlefield than the Autobots'. He recalled how Blaster had pulled him to the damaged Decepticon's side and in his panic revealed a secret Blaster would probably regret telling him. The revelation had left Optimus in a strong enough state of shock that he had automatically given in to Blaster's upset pleading.

A low growl quickly brought Optimus to the present and he finally answered the annoyed medic. "It just seemed like the right thing to do."

**Number 9 said your friends were all morons?**

Optimus glared. Roadbuster smirked. Optimus glared harder. "They are not!" the Prime finally replied, fed up with the staring contest and angry that the Wrecker had even said such a thing. "How could you even _think_-"

"Because they are," the Wrecker answered calmly, no longer smirking. "They all may have battle experience but not all battles are alike and they have _no _idea what we have to go through to accomplish the missions they give us." He was growling now, no longer quite as calm. "They have _no _idea what we have to resort to to pull off some of those stunts and you're all complete morons if you think we can just waltz in there, complete our tasks, and waltz out with nary a scratch! Springer nearly _died _on that last mission and if it hadn't been Topspin with him, he _would _have! You can't keep sending us into these situations constantly. We need a break once in a while to recover. How can you even _think_ we can handle all this that you mindlessly throw us into?!"

Optimus winced, realizing that Roadbuster had a point. It was just too easy to believe the Wreckers could do anything, win any battle or complete any mission no matter how hopeless, that it was easy to forget they weren't immortal. Way too easy to forget. But the problem was that these missions needed to be done and the Wreckers were the best ones for the job. And with the ever escalating hostilities, he couldn't afford to give the Wreckers the time off they so desperately needed.

So Optimus schooled his expression and looked Roadbuster right in the optics as he ordered him from his office, doing his best to ignore the guilt throbbing in his spark.

**Number 10 began to ignore you?**

Optimus shuffled his feet and nervously glanced up and down the hall to make sure no one was around to witness his humiliation. Satisfied that he was alone, he once again knocked on the door in front of him. "Prowl, please open the door so we can discuss this." No answer. "Could you please at least tell me what it was I did?" Still, no answer.

Optimus sighed. Prowl had been using Jazz as a go between all day and Optimus couldn't figure out why. Not even Jazz knew, but the third in command was amused anyways and refused to ask Prowl for him. Which led him here, to the closed door of Prowl's office, pleading like someone who had pissed off a femme. Which was a very dangerous thought to have considering he _was _pleading with someone he had somehow pissed off and who was _not _a femme. As far as he knew. Which was another very dangerous thought to have.

Optimus sighed and leaned forward against the door. "If I bring you some energon and a new book file, will you let me in?" he asked, leaping away from the door as something heavy was suddenly thrown against it. At least it proved that Prowl was indeed in his office.

Definitely a femme in disguise.


	19. Fic Meme Part 2

Title: Fic Meme (creative, I know)  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G-PG  
Characters/Pairings: Various  
Universes: G1, IDW  
Summary: Lots of little ficlets.  
A/N: See Part 1 for full notes.

1. Blaster

2. Springer

3. Skywarp

4. Rumble

5. Hook

6. Red Alert

7. Perceptor

8. Soundwave

9. Roadbuster

10. Prowl

'You': Optimus

**WHAT WOULD THEY DO UNDER THE FOLLOWING CIRCUMSTANCES?**

**2 serial killers are hunting you down. What will Number 1 do?**

Blaster crouched down next to a panting Optimus, looking at the older mech curiously as he absently began playing a quiet dirge. Optimus glared at him. "Not. Helping."

Blaster smirked and silenced the music, before releasing a signal that completely fragged their pursuers systems.

**You're on a vacation with Number 2 and you accidentally break your leg while out in the wilderness. What does Number 2 do?**

Springer stared down at his leader and tried very hard not to laugh. He couldn't hide how very amused he was due to his big grin, but he _wasn't _about to laugh at Optimus Prime.

Where the mech could hear him.

Optimus glared at the Wrecker for a moment before sighing and staring mournfully at his smashed leg. He was very thankful that he could turn off his pain sensors so he couldn't actually _feel_ his smashed leg, but even looking at it caused him to wince. And it didn't help that the injury was completely his own fault. He should have known better than to try to climb such an unstable looking cliff, but he had wanted to see what Springer had found so fascinating up there. And now look at him.

Springer finally gained control over himself and jumped down, landing gracefully next to the downed Prime and taking a close look at the destroyed leg. He looked mildly impressed. Still amused, but impressed. "I can't believe you managed to do this to yourself."

Optimus glared.

After a moment of studying the limb, Springer finally nodded and... pulled a leg out of subspace? Optimus boggled.

Springer looked at him, glanced at the leg, and shrugged. "You never know when you'll need a spare," he said as he laid the leg on the ground and set about disassembling it for parts.

Optimus watched him, feeling a bit faint, and tried very hard not to imagine what other kinds of 'spares' Springer kept.

**It's your birthday. What will 3 give you?**

Optimus stared at the grisly thing that sat on his desk, looking around to see if the one who put it there would reveal himself. No such luck, though he did detect the faint scent of ozone that clued him in to the gift giver's identity.

Optimus sighed and reach out to poke at the disembodied head that Skywarp had left him, noticing with slight satisfaction that it belonged to the very Decepticon that had single-handedly injured nearly a dozen Autobots. He laughed quietly as he carefully moved the head from his desk and placed it in a storage cabinet, wondering how he could thank Skywarp for the rather... interesting gift.

**You're stuck in a burning house. What does Number 4 do?**

Optimus glared at the tiny mech he held in his hand after rescuing him from the still smoldering rubble. "Was that really necessary?"

Rumble coughed and tried to wipe ash off his face, only succeeding in spreading it around. "It stopped the fire, didn't it?"

Optimus continued to glare, his head throbbing from where a support beam had landed on it, and wondered if causing an earthquake was Rumble's solution to everything.

**You're about to do something that will make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will number 5 do?**

"Is the video camera really necessary?"

Hook smirked. "Of course it is."

Optimus sighed.

**You're about to marry Number 10. What's Number 6's reaction?**

Red stared. "You're... getting bonded to Prowl?"

Optimus nodded, wondering why Red Alert was having such a difficult time with the concept. "Yes, I am. Is there a problem?"

Red Alert stared a moment longer before starting to laugh. Evilly. "Oh, this is _good_."

Optimus suddenly felt very, very afraid.

**You got dumped by someone. How would Number 7 cheer you up?**

"It... it will be all right, sir. After all, as the humans say, there are other fish in the sea." Optimus ignored him, continuing to sulk and pout like an overgrown sparkling. Perceptor sighed. "You know, this is getting a bit ridiculous, sir. It's been over an Earth month that you've been hiding in here and Prowl can't handle everything on his own forever." Optimus continued to ignore him.

Perceptor watched him for a moment before sighing and speaking quietly into his comm. Time for plan B.

***

Optimus stared incredulously at the mech the Twins had carried in and bound to his berth, before turning to stare at Perceptor in confusion. "What?"

Perceptor grinned. "Plan B, sir," he said as he turned to leave. "Enjoy."

**You're very angry at someone, how does Number 8 calm you down?**

The Autobots and Decepticons stared blankly at the unconscious Prime for a few long moments before Megatron slowly turned to his communications officer. "Did you just... telepathically put him into a coma?" he asked, much more calmly than he truly felt.

Soundwave stared at him as if he were an idiot. "Yes."

Megatron nodded slowly. "Ok then," he mumbled before his processor caught up with what was happening and short circuited.

Soundwave watched as his leader crashed to the ground, helm sparking, followed soon after bt each and every other Cybertronian present. Soundwave sighed.

**You compete in some tournament. How does Number 9 support you?**

Optimus stared, rebooted his optics, and stared some more. "Is that a... baseball cap on your head?"

Roadbuster nodded, reaching up to adjust the cap. "We'll I did want to show my support." He cheerfully waved a small flag. "I wasn't able to find a giant foam hand though," he said mournfully, still waving the flag.

Optimus nodded and slowly began backing away.

**You can't stop laughing. What will Number 10 do?**

Ratchet smirked as he looked down at a whimpering Optimus. "You'll never learn, will you?" He laughed, taking a few image captures before motioning for his helpers to come lift the poor Prime off the floor. "I can't believe you _laughed _at him."

Optimus glared from his... knotted position on the floor, which only made the medic - and his helpers, the slaggers - laugh harder. It was his own fault, really. He did know better than to annoy an already agitated Prowl; but he honestly never expected his SIC to actually hogtie him for laughing.


	20. Fic Meme Part 3

Title: Fic Meme (creative, I know)  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G-PG  
Characters/Pairings: Various  
Universes: G1, IDW  
Summary: Lots of little ficlets.  
A/N: See Part 1 for full notes.

1. Blaster  
2. Springer  
3. Skywarp  
4. Rumble  
5. Hook  
6. Red Alert  
7. Perceptor  
8. Soundwave  
9. Roadbuster  
10. Prowl  
'You': Optimus

**RELATIONSHIP PART**

**Number 1 says you're all they ever wanted. How do you react?**

Optimus sighed and knelt down in front of the youngling. "Blaster, I'm flattered really, but this is just a crush. I'm way too old for you."

Blaster pouted, looking on the verge of tears. "But, Hoppy..."

Optimus sighed and reached out to hug the young mech. Blaster cuddled against him. "Blaster, you're young; you have your whole life to find the one you're meant to be with." Preferably someone closer to his own age, but Optimus didn't say it. "And you will find them."

Blaster didn't say anything, content, for now, to cuddle as long as Optimus allowed.

**Number 2 thinks that you are deeply in love with Number 9. Your reaction?**

This was getting ridiculous. It was bad enough he couldn't talk to Springer without either Hot Rod or Roadbuster gunning for him, but now Springer thought he was interested in Roadbuster? It was like some weird whacked out soap opera. Not that he knew what a weird whacked out soap opera was like, but he assumed. Honestly. He sighed. "And why would you think that?"

Springer frowned. "The two of you are always locked away in here, and I know you aren't discussing business. What else am I supposed to think?"

Optimus groaned as he recalled those meetings. Meetings in which he was constantly trying to convince Roadbuster that he was _not_ trying to get Springer into his berth. And now Springer thought...

Springer watched in confusion as Optimus suddenly leaned forward and started banging his head on his desk. He grew even more confused when he heard what Optimus was mumbling.

"Stupid slagging oblivious Wrecker actors in stupid slagging whacked out soap operas..."

Springer, extremely confused, slowly backed out of the office.

**You're dating Number 3 and introduce him/her to your parents. Will they get along?  
**

Perceptor looked at Skywarp for a few long moments before giving Optimus a confused glance. "While I'm happy you've finally accepted the fact I'm your creator, I don't think you need my approval if you wish to date someone."

Optimus fidgeted. "Just... tell me what you think."

Perceptor thought a moment before shrugging. "I have no problem with it." He turned suddenly to a nervous Skywarp. "While you're here though, might I have a look at your warp generator?"

He hadn't even finished the sentence before Skywarp frantically grabbed Optimus and teleported out of the lab. Perceptor pouted a bit before grinning.

**  
Number 4 thinks you love Number 9 as well. What does that mean?**

Optimus groaned, hiding his face in his hands. "Does _everyone _think I'm in love with Roadbuster?"

Rumble shrugged. "Pretty much. There's even bets going on about how long you've been together, how long you've been bonded and, if you're not bonded, how long it will take you to do it." He pulled a datapad from subspace and checked it's contents. "Could you answer some of those? Everyone wants to know who won."

Optimus sighed.

**You catch Number 5 kissing someone. Who is it?**

Optimus froze and quickly hid behind a conveniently large tree. He stood there in shock for a long moment before peeking around the tree to see if they were still at it.

They were. So they hadn't noticed him. Or didn't care. Optimus briefly wondered why they were still at war if this kept happening.

Most of all though, he wondered if Red Alert and Scrapper knew Inferno and Hook were having an affair.

**Number 6 appears to be a player, he/she breaks many hearts. What do you do?**

Optimus stared disbelievingly at the depressed fire truck. "He... what?"

Inferno sniffed. "He was just using me. He tossed me aside as soon as Starscream showed an interest." He sniffed some more. "I should've listened to Blaster when he warned me."

Optimus watched the firetruck crying for a few moments, at a loss as what to do, before hesitantly patting the mech's soldier in what he hoped was a comforting gesture.

**You had a haircut and Number 7 can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?**

The staring was starting to get annoying. That and the laughing. It was bad enough he had had to put up with Ratchet's comments, he didn't need this as well. "It's not that interesting, you know," Optimus growled, tugging futility at the accursed object on his head.

Perceptor smirked as he once again took in Optimus' rather... unique appearance. "I'm sorry, but it's not everyday I see a mech wearing a wig. However did the twins convince you to let them glue it on your head?"

Optimus growled some more and began imagining all the different ways he could murder the twins, Ratchet, Perceptor and any other idiot who dared to laugh at him.

**Number 8 thinks he/she'll never get married. What do you say?**

Optimus sighed and wonder why it was always him that everyone, no matter the faction, came to with their troubles. "Soundwave, you're an intelligent and... attractive mech. I'm sure there's someone out there for you, you just have to look."

**Number 9 sends you an e-mail asking you to meet him/her somewhere. Now what?**

Optimus read the note for the umpteenth time as he nervously walked down the hall. He could think of several reasons the Wrecker would want to see him; either to yell at him for once again 'attempting' to 'seduce' Springer, to complain about the conditions the Wreckers have to deal with, or he somehow learned of the rumour going around. Although, since Roadbuster had asked him to come to an out of the way storage room for a private meeting - and that would send the rumours soaring - he decided it was option number four: Roadbuster was going to murder him for once again 'attempting' to 'seduce' Springer. Optimus called himself an idiot many times for agreeing to this, but he was a bit curious.

Although he did let anyone who would listen know exactly where he was going and who he was meeting. Which was also very bad for rumours but at least when he turned up dead, they'd know who to blame.

**Number 10 says he's/she's never kissed anyone before. Your reaction?**

"Can I be your first then?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, Optimus was attacked by every other mech who had been listening to the drunk SIC rambling. Prowl just stared mournfully at his empty energon cube, completely oblivious to all the mechs fighting over him.


	21. Fic Meme Part 4&5

Title: Fic Meme (creative, I know)  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G-PG  
Characters/Pairings: Various  
Universes: G1, IDW  
Summary: Lots of little ficlets.  
A/N: See Part 1 for full notes.

1. Blaster  
2. Springer  
3. Skywarp  
4. Rumble  
5. Hook  
6. Red Alert  
7. Perceptor  
8. Soundwave  
9. Roadbuster  
10. Prowl  
'You': Optimus

**FRIENDSHIP PART**

**Number 1 is wondering if he/she has a soulmate. What do you say?**

"Everyone has a soulmate, Blaster," he told the curious youngling that sat at his feet. "However, not everyone meets there's."

Blaster frowned as he watched Optimus work. "But how will I know if I meet mine?"

Optimus smiled and sat down his datapad. "You'll just know, Blaster. Don't worry, you'll know."

**Would Number 2 ever trust Number 5?**

Optimus briefly wondered if he had somehow damaged his logic circuits. That was the only way that this situation would make any kind of sense.

"So if I put this gunk of Mixmaster's into this particular acid-"

"You get a rather large explosion. Bonecrusher enjoys it."

Springer grinned brightly at Hook. "Nice!"

Optimus crashed.

**Number 3 wants to go shopping, will Number 7 come along?**

"I... I think I'll stay here, if you don't mind. He's going to want to go to the joke shops and I'd much rather remain ignorant of what he's planning. It's better for my sanity."

Optimus pouted.

**Number 4 is bored and pokes Number 10. What happens after that?**

"Optimus, he keeps poking me."

Optimus sighed, wondering why he always had to get stuck with the children. "Then poke him back; I'm busy," he growled as he continued in his appointed task. For one blessed moment, there was quiet. But then...

"Prime, tell him to pick on someone his own size!"

Optimus growled. "You brought this on yourself by poking him, Rumble! Now if you'll _excuse _me." He stalked off, mumbling under his breath as he finally escaped his SIC and the captured 'Con.

This was the last time he let Ratchet talk him into babysitting Prowl when the mech's battle computer malfunctioned.

**Number 5 and Number 1 are forced to go to the same school. What class will they take together?**

Blaster stared curiously at the other sparkling, watching as the little green and purple mech carefully put the toy skyscraper next to another toy building. Seeing another building on his side of the play mat, Blaster gently picked it up and moved it closer to the other sparkling.

Hook paused and looked at the building, smiling at Blaster as he took it and set it on the other side of the skyscraper.

Blaster smiled. Maybe Papa and Daddy were right; maybe he _would _enjoy pre-school.

**If Number 6 and Number 3 cooked dinner together, what would they make?**

"Is it supposed to do that?" Red Alert asked, watching as the vat of liquid started to twitch and overflow. And started _moaning_. Oh slag. "Is it... alive?"

Skywarp shrugged and watched as what should have been a special batch of energon slowly began to _crawl _towards them. He panicked. "Looks like!" he screamed, quickly grabbing Red Alert and warping away.

He hoped Optimus and Inferno weren't _really _looking forward to a home cooked meal.

**Number 7 and Number 9 apply for a job together. What job?**

They stared at each other, surprised and embarrassed to see each other here. Finally, after a few long moments, Roadbuster finally asked: "So... here for the sparkling sitting job too?"

**Number 8 gives Number 5 a haircut. Is that okay?**

Hook cowered against the far wall. "_Oh_ no! You are not gluing any type of wig on me; I don't care how many bets you lost!"

Soundwave pouted.

**Number 10 sketches Number 6. Will Number 6 be happy?**

Red Alert stared at the drawing Prowl had just handed him, studying it carefully before glancing up at the artist. "I don't look that young, do I?"

Prowl smirked and nodded.

**Number 10 and Number 8 are laughing while they talk. What is their conversation about?**

The Autobots and Decepticons watched, feeling a profound sense of horror, as Soundwave and Prowl talked. Some where curious over what they found so funny, but most where far too scared to wonder exactly what had managed to cause those two, of all mechs, to fall to the ground in hysterical laughter.

**WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF…**

**Number 1 accidentally kicked Number 10?**

Blaster winced and stared nervously up at the adult mech when he realized exactly who it was he had kicked. "Sorry," he mumbled, wondering if kicking Prowl meant he would get grounded. Or worse, have his music taken away.

Prowl frowned at the upset sparkling for a few moments before realizing his staring was causing Blaster to start to cry. He sighed. "It's all right, Blaster. Smokescreen and I do look a lot alike. Just be more sure of your target next time."

Blaster smiled and nodded as he ran off in search of the correct mech, happy he had gotten away without even a lecture.

**Number 2 sent Number 9 an e-mail?**

Roadbuster smiled as he read the e-mail once again. While he was confused over Springer's belief that he was interested in Optimus, and slightly upset that Springer apparently gave his blessing, the fact that said blessing was buried in about five pages of babbling lifted his spark. Springer only babble for two reasons. One, he was embarrassed and Roadbuster didn't think that was the case here. Or, two, he was jealous and was trying to hide it. Springer was jealous over Roadbuster's non-existent relationship with Optimus. The Wrecker smirked.

Take _that, _Hot Rod.

**Number 4 and Number 7 discovered they made out while being drunk?**

The Autobot and Decepticon stared at each other. "We never speak of this again," Rumble growled.

Perceptor nodded and looked away. "Agreed."

**Number 5 and Number 6 took a walk together, what do they talk about?**

"Ok, I get Inferno Monday through Wednesday, you get him Thursday through Saturday, and we alternate Sundays," Red Alert said, mentally adding the dates to his schedule as he and his companion drove down the highway.

The crane thought a moment, before rumbling in agreement. "Acceptable"

**Number 5 noticed she/he wasn't invited for your birthday?**

Optimus couldn't believe what he was hearing. "But we don't even like each other!"

Hook glared. "That's no excuse for rudeness."

**Number 7 won the lottery?**

Perceptor frowned. "I won what?"

Smokescreen smirked and handed him a datapad. "You won the lottery!" The Datsun was almost bouncing in excitement.

Perceptor stared blankly at the datapad as he took it. He glanced at it then look up in confusion. "There was a lottery?"

Smokescreen facepalmed.

**Number 8 had quite a big secret?**

Soundwave sighed in relief as he finally managed to herd his cassettes from his quarters. He closed and locked the door once they were out of sight, pausing a long moment to give the immediate area a quick mental scan.

All clear.

Soundwave almost bounced as he crossed his room to the storage locker that sat in the corner. Undoing all five locks, he carefully opened the locker and gently lifted his most prized possession into his arms.

He loved his sock monkey.

**Number 4 became a famous singer?**

"FOR THE LAST TIME, _NO, _I WILL _NOT _APPEAR ON YOUR SLAGGING STUPID TALK SHOW!!!!"

Soundwave winced at the volume Rumble's voice reached and vowed to screen all of Rumble's calls in the future.

**Number 10 had a daughter? **

Ironhide frowned at the depressed Datsun, thinking over what he had just heard. "A daughter?"

Prowl nodded as he gazed mournfully at the tabletop, resting his head on his arms. "Yes, I had her shortly after I graduated from the Academy. She was so..." He sighed. "So perfect. I wanted to give her everything."

Ironhide laid a comforting hand on Prowl's shoulder. "What happened?" he questioned gently, realizing the mech needed to talk about this.

Prowl sighed again, turning his head slightly so he could look at Ironhide out of the corner of his optics. "She grew up, met someone, and..." He looked away. "They died... before the war."

Ironhide frowned; he had expected that from the way Prowl was acting, but he had hoped otherwise. "What was her name?" He was hesitant to ask, but he was curious.

Prowl sighed. "Ariel. My little Ariel."

Ironhide _stared_.


	22. Fic Meme Part 6

Title: Fic Meme (creative, I know)  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G-PG  
Characters/Pairings: Various  
Universes: G1, IDW, and one that can be seen as 2007verse  
Summary: Lots of little ficlets.  
A/N: See Part 1 for full notes.

1. Blaster  
2. Springer  
3. Skywarp  
4. Rumble  
5. Hook  
6. Red Alert  
7. Perceptor  
8. Soundwave  
9. Roadbuster  
10. Prowl  
'You': Optimus

**LAST PART…**

**What would Number 1 think of Number 2?**

Blaster stared in awe at the computer screen as it played a live video feed of the training room, where one of the Wreckers was fighting - no, _slaughtering_ - all challengers. Including the twins. Blaster grinned. "That is wicked _awesome!"_

**What would Number 2 find weird about Number 3?**

"So..." Springer said suddenly, glancing curiously at the 'Con. "In order to use your warping... thing, you have to determine all the variables, run all these complicated and confusing calculations." He paused. "And you have to do this each and every time?"

Skywarp nodded.

"Then why do you let everyone think you're an idiot?" the Wrecker asked in disbelief.

Skywarp shrugged. "It's fun."

Springer stared. "You're insane."

"Yep!"

**How would Number 3 greet Number 4?**

"TAG, YOU'RE IT!"

Rumble blinked. "What?" Then he realized what had just been said. "Hey, no fair teleporting!" he yelled as he took off down the hall.

**What would Number 4 be jealous about Number 5?**

It wasn't fair. Hook was Gestalt, bonded - in a way - to the other Constructicons. He always knew how each of them was doing, if they were hurt or scared or lost. Rumble sighed. He would give anything to know if Frenzy was still alive.

**What dream would Number 5 have about Number 6?**

Red Alert choked. "I was _what_?" he squeaked.

Hook groaned, wincing at the high pitched tone, and offlined his optics. "You were dancing the hula while floating around Inferno's head. And you were _tiny_."

Red Alert stared hard at the hungover mech. "I don't think you should drink anymore of Mixmaster's special brew. Ever."

Hook could only groan in agreement.

**What do Number 6 and Number 7 have in common?**

Red Alert and Perceptor studied each other for a moment, before turning back to the others. "We're both red," Perceptor finally answered.

**What would make Number 7 angry at Number 8?**

Soundwave winced and frantically scrambled away from the angry Autobot scientist. He really hadn't meant to do that, it was a complete accident. He hadn't known how delicate the equipment was and how difficult it was to calibrate. Honestly.

Perceptor growled as he moved in for the kill, and Soundwave started to pray.

**Where would Number 8 meet Number 9?**

Roadbuster paused a moment as he entered the bar, recognizing the mech that sat alone in a corner booth. Almost hidden but not hidden enough to be overlooked by a Wrecker. Especially a Wrecker who had expected to find him hiding in one of the dark corners. He made his way to the booth, nodding at the Decepticon as he sat across from him. "You asked to see me?"

**What would Number 9 never dare to tell Number 10?**

Roadbuster watched the Autobot's second in command with barely concealed annoyance. The doorwinged mech had done nothing but cause trouble for the Wreckers. Not that the Wreckers hadn't caused plenty of trouble and pain for the Prowl, but they hadn't targeted him specifically. They were just following orders, after all, and it wasn't their fault Autobots as a whole were oblivious morons. So easy to fool. It almost made Roadbuster want to tell him everything; tell him all about the 'failed' missions, the location of missing 'Bots, who the Wreckers were _really _loyal to. But most of all, he wanted to tell Prowl that the destruction of Praxus had been the Wreckers' idea. That they had decided on that particular city after Prowl had annoyed them one time too many. That, in fact, the destruction of Prowl's home was Prowl's own fault. The look on Prowl's face when he was told that would amuse the Wreckers for vorns to come.

But in the end, Roadbuster decided against it. After all, it would be much more amusing if the Autobot were to discover it on his own.

**What would make 10 scared of 1? **

Prowl stared hard at Blaster, watching as the sparkling calmly drew on the large sketch pad he had been given. Most sparklings Blasters age would draw simple things; buildings, people, animals, or the things in their immediate area. Blaster though...

Blaster drew dark things. Dead mechs and femmes scattered across an energon soaked battlefield. Two armies, one side red and the other side purple, fighting on a strangely green world that was slowly turning black with decay. An empty, dying Cybertron.

The drawings were simplistic, lacking detail an older mech would give it, but even then, when Prowl looked at it, he could hear the cries of those dying, feel the cold wind as if he too were standing on that battlefield. And as he leaned closer, he could almost smell the rotting energon that soaked the dead. The pictures were horrifying, but what made it far worse was the cheerful melody Blaster sang as he added more energon to a pink colored femme.

Prowl stared at the sparkling for a long while, watching as even more horrors were added to the drawing, and he knew there was something very wrong with Blaster.


	23. Beloved

**Title: Beloved  
Author: kirin-saga  
Pairing: Roadbuster/Springer  
Rated: PG  
A/N: Requested by lady_katana4544.  
Summary: After a battle, Roadbuster needs to reassure himself that all is well.**

* * *

It was a beautiful thing, what they had together. A sense of peace and safety that they could only achieve with each other, when they were alone together in the darkness and the world was unable reach their sanctuary. Not even the other Wreckers dared disturb them, for which Roadbuster was grateful.

Springer was curled up in his lap, absently playing with Roadbuster's fingers, obviously trying to push the morning's nearly disastrous mission from his mind. Roadbuster himself had given up trying to get the image of Springer at Vortex's mercy out of his mind, instead wrapping his free arm tightly around Springer's waist and directing his sensors over the triplechanger's body to assure himself there were no further injuries. Springer, for once, tolerated the scans.

When Roadbuster had seen Springer in Vortex's arms, he hadn't known what to do. There was a whole battlefield between them, no way for him to reach his bondmate in time. If Scoop hadn't been there...

Roadbuster shuddered and tightened his grip, causing Springer to look blankly up at him. He had come so close to losing him... He didn't know... "I don't know what I'd do... If he had..."

Springer just continued to stare at him, too tired from the day's battle and the painkillers Topspin had given him to really focus on what Roadbuster was saying. Roadbuster sighed and gently freed his hand from Springer's loose grip, wrapping his now freed arm around Springer and pulling him even closer. "I love you, you know. I love you so much, so very much." Springer nuzzled tiredly against him, being lulled into sleep by the gentle hum of Roadbuster's systems. "My love, always my love..." Springer was asleep now, curled trustingly in Roadbuster's arms. "My beloved..."

Roadbuster stayed there long into the night, long after Topspin should have come to kick him out of the medbay, unwilling to release Springer or go to sleep himself for fear that he would wake in the morning to learn Springer's rescue had been a dream. That Vortex had succeeded in killing Springer; or worse, that he had taken Springer away and that Roadbuster would never see him again, only knowing he was alive by the echoes of pain and fear felt through the bond. Roadbuster didn't think he could survive either.

So he sat there through the night, watching over Springer as he slept, and praying to any god that would listen that they would keep his love safe.


	24. Falling

**Title: Falling  
Author: kirin-saga  
Pairing: Skyfire/Red Alert  
Rated: G  
A/N: Requested by raelynhb.  
________________________________________**

Skyfire didn't know when it had happened. He hadn't _wanted _it to happen, not with anyone who wasn't Starscream and especially not with someone who had an overprotective best friend. Especially when said overprotective best friend was so flame-happy. Skyfire could almost feel his plating melting already, even though he knew Inferno couldn't possibly create a fire hot enough to damage Skyfire's thick hull.

Skyfire didn't need this; not after everything that had happened with Starscream. Why was it that he always had to fall for the ones with serious problems? Why couldn't he, for once, love someone that was calm and well-adjusted? And who didn't have a flame-happy, overprotective best friend. Skyfire sighed, accepting that he was cursed to always love those that needed taking care of. And despite the fact Red Alert had Inferno, Skyfire could see that the firetruck wasn't enough; that he could never give Red Alert what he needed. Inferno needed something more than to be stuck with Red Alert. Skyfire could see it every time Inferno had to cancel plans, take over duty shifts, or calm Red Alert whenever the security director was having a bad day. Inferno was beginning to look like a caged animal. Overprotective or not, it was only a matter of time before he left. Skyfire could see that.

And Skyfire could see that when that happened, he himself would step up to take Inferno's place. Because Skyfire had fallen and had fallen hard, and he would love Red Alert the way Inferno never could.


	25. Forsaken

Title: Forsaken  
Author: kirin-saga  
A/N: Requested by arkred.  
Summary: For so long, they were all they had.  
_____________________________________

They were all that was left, and though they had once hated each other, now neither could imagine living without the other. Together they had fled their dying world as their father, their god, had rained destruction on the once proud race. Together they had kept themselves sane and whole as they ran from their god, ignoring the guilt, the knowledge that their own actions had brought about the deaths of their people.

They hadn't known what to do, at first, beyond keeping one step ahead of their pursuer and had drifted aimlessly from world to world, stopping only when desperately in need of rest. They ignored, for the most part, the races that occupied these worlds, trying hard to convince themselves that they weren't condemning these people to destruction. Because their god followed in their wake and he would go through worlds if he had to.

They had continued in this way for countless ages; never stopping, rarely resting, with only each other for company. And although they hated each other, they loved each other as well. Because you can't rely on someone so deeply without feeling some kind of love for them. And they believed that all they would ever have was each other, which was another reason to love.

Then one day, they had looked around to see where they were and had found a world so unlike the others they had seen since fleeing their home. A world that painfully reminded them of their own god. For this world was a god as well, only younger than their own. And this god still loved his children. This god's children were happy and whole and living peacefully, just as their own people once lived on their own god.

They had considered leaving this god behind, not wanting to risk their own god discovering him. But though they had each other, loved each other, they were both so very lonely and so very tired. And this god, while younger, felt as strong as their own god and it was possible they would finally be safe here, on this world, if the god allowed it.

The god - called Primus, they had learned - was curious when they had introduced themselves, seemingly unsure what to think of these beings that were so like his own children and yet so different. They explained that they were simply looking for a home, that their own was so very far away and that they were too tired to return to it. They wanted a place they could rest and be happy. And Primus had allowed it.

They called themselves Prowl, and Starscream. Names very different than the ones they once had, but this was a new home, a new beginning. They had stopped calling each other by name so long ago anyhow; when they had been alone, names had not been important. They weren't even sure if they remembered their true names.

They hadn't told Primus of their own god - of Unicron - and tried to convince themselves that it wasn't necessary. Unicron, though powerful, was slow and they had taken such an indirect route that it was unlikely he would find them here so quickly. And perhaps Primus' existence would be enough to prevent Unicron from attacking. They didn't think Unicron had ever met another god like him.

So Prowl and Starscream settled on this new god, who the children called Cybertron as if Primus hadn't a name of his own, and grew to love this young god as much as they had once loved their own, before they had been forsaken so very long ago. And while they couldn't be entirely happy here, in this world so different from their own lost home, they were at least content and were satisfied.

And as they lay together and watched the young race grow and change, they felt safe and no longer watched the sky in fear of their god's anger.


	26. Battle Forged

**Title: Battle Forged  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: PG  
Summary: They had never hated each other, they had just never _liked _each other. Until now.  
A/N: for eerian_sadow. I suck at battle scenes, so no actual battles. Sorry. I hope you like it. I'm not entirely satisfied with it myself.  
________________________________**

They had known each other since before the war. They hadn't been friends, had barely interacted, but they had known each other. The most contact they had had with each other, before the war, had been brief moments in the halls when their paths crossed, or when one of their mates had gotten the other overcharged and forced them to drag the two away from the bars. They hadn't been friends, not nearly. But they hadn't hated each other either; they hadn't cared to know each other enough to decide whether they hated or liked each other.

All that had changed, when the war came. When their mates had taken a ship in search of energon and had disappeared so long ago. Now, they looked around their dying world and saw how much they had lost. They looked and saw that all they had, really, was each other. So they protected each other, grew to like each other. Maybe even love each other, in a way.

They were far from the only ones to lose someone, to not know if friends or family was still alive somewhere. But none of the others had the same responsibilities. None of the others had to maintain a strong front when all they wanted to do was break down and scream. Chromia and Elita hadn't that luxury. They had to be strong, stable, someone to look up to and to inspire the remaining Autobots.

They couldn't always hold off the screams, however, and when it all became too much, they had each other. They held the other when she couldn't see how she could possibly take anymore of the pain, helped her to see that there was still hope, that Optimus and Ironhide were alive. They could feel them so they were _alive._ And that had to be enough.

They hadn't liked each other when they first met; they hadn't known each other well enough for that. But since then, they have fought together, watched their world die together, suffered together. They were all each other had, and they were sisters, battle forged.

They would keep each other alive and together, they would welcome Optimus and Ironhide home.


	27. Wrench

**Title: Wrench  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: PG  
A/N: For mmouse15.  
___________________________________**

Ratchet sighed, reaching out to gently, hesitantly, stroke the still form in front of him. He didn't understand why this had hit him so hard, why he hadn't been more prepared... Sparkplug had told him they had short lifespans, shorter than humans even; but still Wrench's death had been completely unexpected.

Ratchet smiled sadly, now holding Wrench's cold body safely in one hand, and remembered the first time he had seen the tiny creature. The dog had been filthy, half-starved and weak and had growled as fiercely as he was able when he'd been caught in Ratchet's headlights when the medic had been heading home late one night. Having nothing better to do, Ratchet had sat and watched the creature, curious despite himself, and soon enough, the dog's own curiosity got the better of it.

Surprisingly, it hadn't been difficult to convince Optimus to let him keep it.

Swoop had been the one to name him, saying that Wrench was perfect for a pet of Ratchet's. Everyone had agreed.

Wrench had been old when he came to live at the Ark; he suffered from arthritis and poor eyesight, but he never let that slow him down. Some days he acted like an overgrown puppy. Ratchet took comfort in the fact that he had been so happy.

Ratchet sighed and lovingly placed Wrench in the small casket Grapple had made for him and that Sunstreaker had decorated with small paintings of Wrench playing with various Autobots. The funeral would be in half an hour and Ratchet couldn't spend much longer alone with his friend. So he gave Wrench one last careful stroke and closed the casket lid.

Wrench had been with them for only six short months, but that had been more than enough time for everyone to love him.


	28. Not Forgotten

**Title: Not Forgotten  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G  
A/N: For outerelf.  
Summary: He had been forgotten, and he hadn't known.  
________________________________________**

Broadside had been the one to find it. He had been going through old files, having nothing better to do, when he had located it in a nearly empty folder in one of Impactor's files. Broadside didn't know how one of the deceased Autobot's files got in Xantium's computer - Impactor had been long dead by the time they had met the sentient ship - but supposed one of the others had uploaded it. In any case, the document was an interesting read, and one he thought Springer should take a look at.

"He wanted Inferno on the team?" Springer asked, sounding mildly annoyed, when he read the document Broadside had brought him.

Broadside knew the annoyance wasn't aimed at Inferno, the mech had long since earned their respect, but more because Springer hadn't known that the mech he practically worshiped had been considering adding to their team. "His stats, bio, and a list of reprimands are all there, Springer. Severely out of date, of course, but everything shows that he'd make a good Wrecker. Impactor just never got around to actually recruiting him."

Springer was still reading the file. The reprimands were similar to those listed under his own file, and the files of the other Wreckers. Confrontational, disrespectful of authority (though in Springer's mind, only an idiot would respect those who were in charge at the time), frequent insubordination... The only thing missing were reports of violent and uncontrollable behavior; but then, Inferno wasn't a triplechanger and was therefor not a victim of irrational fears and prejudice. Broadside was right; Inferno would make a good Wrecker. However... "We're not asking him."

Broadside nodded, accepting the decision. He himself was comfortable with the way things were and he knew the others would be resistant to any changes. He had only wanted Springer's opinion on Impactor's choice. Though he was curious about Springer's reasoning. "Why not?"

Springer sighed and closed the file, flagging it so he could easily locate it later if needed. "He's needed where he is; it would cause too many disruptions if we were to uproot him now." He smirked. "Besides, Red would kill me if I let his mate go into the kind of situations we regularly face. That mech can be _scary_ when he wants to be."

Broadside had to smile at that; no Wrecker in their right mind (well, what passed as right for them) would forget that. Not if they wanted their dignity and reputation intact. Sandstorm had learned _that _the hard way. "But?" he asked, knowing Springer wouldn't just leave it at that and forget about it.

"_But,_" Springer continued, adding some notes to the file's description, "we'll keep an optic on him; help him out if he needs it. If Impactor thought he was good enough to be a Wrecker, then he's a Wrecker; whether we ever let him know it or not." Though it would be funny to let that fact 'slip' to Prowl. The mech would have an epic fit if he were to learn there was a Wrecker in permanent residence. He'd have to remember to accidentally mention it.

Broadside quietly slipped out, leaving Springer to his plotting. He knew it was a good idea to mention the file; it had already proved to be entertaining. Besides, Springer had been bored of late, which usually caused Roadbuster's stress levels to rise as he tried to prevent Springer from going crazy from having nothing to do. This would keep Springer occupied until the next mission came in, hopefully.

Broadside happily returned to his self-imposed task of searching old files, wondering what else he would find.


	29. Rhyming Simon

**Title: Rhyming Simon  
Author: kirin-saga  
Rated: G  
Summary: He wondered if someone had somehow managed to spike the energon.  
A/N: For undeadharlot.  
_________________________________**

Optimus' day had started out fairly normal. He left his quarters, greeted several Autobots on the way to his office, calmed an agitated Prowl, and dragged Blaster back into the non-radio world. All very normal and much like any other day, save that today he somehow managed to avoid tripping over an invisible Mirage. It was after he had had his morning energon, from his own private dispenser, that the day took a turn for the weird.

He hadn't noticed it at first, being safely tucked away in his office. He had only become aware of today's strangeness when Jazz had barged in asking what had happened to Prowl. Optimus, feeling curious despite himself, had followed him to where Prowl was sitting in the command center, spinning slowly in his swivel chair and staring intensely at empty air. After watching in confusion for a brief moment, Optimus contacted Ratchet to tell him Prowl's logic circuits were damaged (or something), then he decided he deserved a break. He left Prowl in Jazz's (not so) safe hands and headed to the rec room.

One the way, he realized what a mistake this decision was, as within minutes, he tripped over an overcharged Bumblebee, a hyper Cliffjumper, a giggling Sunstreaker, and a pink Hound. And he hadn't even reached the rec room yet.

It was as he was passing the Dinobots' open door that he began suspecting something about the energon. Because he hadn't even thought Grimlock had liked the little mech that was leading the Dinobots in a rhyming game of Simon Says. Optimus stopped to stare, which unfortunately caught Swoop's attention which caused Optimus to be somehow dragged into the game. And since Wheelie gave him a puppy opticked glare every time he tried to leave, he had a feeling he would be here a while.

Grimlock was disturbingly good at rhyming and even helped his brothers when needed. And he seemed an expert at Wheelie's version of Simon Says, which lead to the (also disturbing) conclusion that this was far from the first time the Dinobot leader had played this game with the small mech. Which lead to the terrifying conclusion that once you played this game, Wheelie would make you play again and again until you were his brainwashed slave of rhyming fun. Optimus couldn't have that and so took a page from Prowl's book and feigned a malfunction that caused him to crash. Sadly, he hit his head going down and managed to knock himself unconscious.

He woke later to find that Simon Said the Dinobots had to paint him neon green with hot pink polka dots. Optimus locked himself in his quarters and refused to come out for five days.

He also dismantled his energon dispenser. As you can imagine, he was very hungry once he came out.


End file.
